Dating Online? Watch that Ad!
by John G. , Founder
New to online dating? Trying to find the man or woman of your dreams through the virtual world? You need to have a well-written personal ad or dating profile.
People donít believe me when I tell them that most problems with not enough quality responses to an online dating ad can be fixed just by writing a clean, informative profile full of good content. And then I take them to an online dating site and randomly start reading out profiles, and they cannot believe that there are such a large number of terrible ads! Maybe it is this overvalued notion of spontaneity, of writing whatever comes to your mind, letting it flow - which leads you to write gibberish in your ads. Say goodbye to any success in online dating with that. Think what would happen if NASA engineers became spontaneous.
So stop your online dating shuttle from crashing and read the following examples of common mistakes in dating profiles. Have a laugh, but be carefulÖ your own profile may have bugs too! (All examples are real)
..."I am a funny, witty person with a great sense of humor...."
Funny and witty people never write that directly. Instead of saying this, add a touch of humor to your profile.
..."I am sexy, flirtatious,... I like kisses on my back, full body massages from my boyfriend/girlfriend..."
Keep sexual innuendos out of your profile. You will have plenty of time to exchange raunchy emails if you are addicted to writing sexual stuff... but in the first impression, keep them out. Would you say this to a guy or a girl in a bar who you met for the first time? If not, then don't say it in your ad either.
...."I am an honest, spontaneous, creative, imaginative (..other personal adjectives) person..."
Very few people think they are not, this is very subjective (same as the fact that 80% people believe that they have an IQ above average!). Avoid using personal adjectives in your ad. Define yourself concretely-better to say I am a guitar player in a band, I write novels, or I am a cardiologist than I am creative or spontaneous.
...."I was just bored, so wrote my profile here..."
A negative attitude. Instead, say, "I am new to this..."
...."I like taking walks by the ocean, or watching TV, or going camping with my friends..."
Unimportant details. Most people like these things, and these are hardly good criteria for finding a partner (it is unlikely you won't like going out with someone just because they don't like walking the beach or watching TV with you). Your hobbies is where you put these things, and more specifically-e.g. snow boarding, or playing basketball.
...."I am looking for a REAL man/woman, with all the letters of REAL..."
Sounds like you have had some bad experiences in relationships, but that's over now. Come with a positive attitude to online dating, ready to meet new and interesting people.
..."I want a guy who can make me laugh..."
Comes across as negative-you sound slightly depressed if you need someone just to make you laugh. There's plenty of stuff on the TV to make you laugh, and you are not looking for a joker, you are looking for a boyfriend, a mate...remember?
...."I like blonde women, but if you are dark-haired and very beautiful, write me anyway, maybe you can change my mind...."
Turn-off to both blonde women and dark-haired women. Donít play both sides of the coin, generally backfires. Better not to say anything if you are not sure.
...."I am not interested in guys who are bitter and boring..."
No one is. Use the Ad mostly to tell what you like, not what you don't like. Just as in real life, agreeability is a must have in first introductions.
If you want John to review or rewrite your Dating Profile,visit http://www.dating-profile.com